Valve

Valve is a video game company located in Onetwofour, a country inside the state of Washington. The company is headed by Gaben. They have made multiple popular video game franchises, including Team Fortress and Half-Life. They are completely clueless about the number three.

Why In The Flying F*ck Do They Not Know About the Number Three?
Because they're Valve, that's why.

None of their games have the number three. They have Team Fortress Classic and Team Fortress 2, but no 3. They have Left 4 Dead and Left 4 Dead 2, but no 3. They have Counter-Strike, Counter-Strike: Source, etc., but no 3. They have Half-Life, Half-Life 2, Half-Life 2: Episode One, Half-Life 2: Episode Two, Half-Life: Source, and a bunch of other crud, but no 3. Get it now? Valve is completely clueless about the number three. In fact, saying the number three to any Valve employee will cause them to implode into potatoes. And yes, that's number 3 of Jebus's 15.5 methods of making potatoes. The Gaben potatoes in particular taste really raunchy, and tend to be the plumpest of the bunch. ( By the way, don't ask about methods 1 and 9, YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW o_O)

And now it's time for Valve to be compared to some cheerleaders.
Cheerleaders always say "1, 2, 3, 4. 5, 6, 7, 8." Note how they never say 9. The square root of 9 is 3.

yes, I know what you're thinking. And yes, it's true.

Everyone in Valve is a cheerleader.

and yes.

that means...

cheerleader gaben



HE HAS BREASTS

THE HORROR

well he had man boobs before BUT THIS IS GRUESOME